Eat Pray Love (2010) [review]
Never seen it, sounds pathetic
(non) Quick Review
I’m happy to watch anything. My preference is horror sci-fi, but there’s very little I won’t watch. Mostly foreign films because they do not translate well and waste my time. I know I’m not going to like them, so why review them? They aren’t for me.
‘Eat Pray Love’ is a Western film I refuse to watch due to comedian Chip Chipperson Jim Norton. He performed a parody review, for this movie he also had not seen, which perfectly translated the synopsis from the spiritualistic language of Cockwhorian in to English…
Greg (interview):
“The movie begins, she’s a wreck, the Julia Roberts character’s a wreck. She’s bankrupt, her wedding’s over and she just says “you know what, I’m gonna get up and I’m gonna leave” What kind of message does this sent to American women?”
Presumably he meant ‘marriage' not ‘wedding’?
Jim (reviewer):
“It’s important Greg because it says no matter how lousy a wife you are or how bad an employee, how horrible you are with money; there’s always time for a vacation.”
The movie sounds like a privileged, ultra-feminist, hysterical-period drama; an old woman going through the menopause abandons her responsibilities for cock. Unfortunately she’s devoured every cock in a 1,000 mile radius, so embarks on a global coxpedition. The only other actors named within the synopsis are 3 men. I bet all the money I don’t have that she bangs each of them. Empowerment! Slag.
A true story? Bullshit. A marketing scam tagged on to every film which under-performed in test screenings. Everyone partaking in this lie should be sent to prison for fraud and misrepresentation. Which would be everyone in Hollywood. They aren’t imprisoned for being paedophiles and rapists, so why would they for this!
The events in this film may have taken place. Only in the same way ‘Titanic’ (1997) took place. There was a ship which sunk and a lot of people died. Everything else is fiction. There was likely a woman who failed at life then cruised for cock instead of fixing her problems. Everything else is fiction.
I have watched ‘Big Fish’ (2003), ‘Four Weddings and a Funeral’ (1994) and ‘Steel Magnolias’ (1989) numerous times. I don’t mind girl films.
I will not watch ‘Eat Pray Love’.
Overview
Genre(s): Period Drama, Menopausal Horse Shit
Location(s): Don’t care
Writer(s): Ryan Murphy, Jennifer Salt, Elizabeth Gilbert
Director(s): Ryan Murphy
Main Actor(s):
‘Julia Roberts’ as ‘Liz Gilbert’
…other people
Official Synopsis:
“Believing there's more to life than a husband, house and career, Liz Gilbert (Julia Roberts) finds herself with a new appetite for life in this inspiring true story, based on the best-selling book. She leaves New York and embarks on a yearlong journey - traveling to Italy, India and Bali - seeking self-discovery through good food, meditation and the prospect of finding true love. James Franco, Bully Crudup and Javier Bardem co-star in this sumptuous and uplifting adventure filled with humour and heart.”
Box Art:
